Truth and Love

Often those who are closest to us are the ones who can hurt us the most, right? I mean, two people can say the exact same thing to us and we laugh at one and are outraged by the other. And that makes sense because those we allow to get closest to us we trust with more of our lives giving them the potential to hurt us more.
But then the opposite can be true, too. There’s a show called ‘A Million Little Things’ that I am just loving because of its take on mental illness and current events, but also because of the character Gary. Gary is a passionate guy who puts himself out there in many different ways, but in it’s his blunt and raw humor that is really refreshing. After one of his friends loses the use of his legs, Gary forces him to come play basketball like they’ve always done. Then, he calls him ‘Professor X’ as he pushes him in his wheelchair onto the basketball court, then he easily blocks his wheelchair-bound friend’s shot and later makes fun of him for taking 15 minutes to get his wheelchair out of the car.
And as an outsider watching this dynamic, it feels almost harsh for Gary to treat his friend this way, but that’s the type of friend Gary is. He might be a little rude and even obnoxious in his humor, but he’s also very loving and even tender when the situation calls for it. And since this is a TV show, it works for him.
But I think it’s also fairly realistic, too. Henry Cloud wrote, “The amount of truth a relationship can handle is proportional to the amount of perceived love that's present.” Gary can be blunt because he so obviously loves his friend.
Ultimately when we feel loved and secured and know that someone is looking out for our best interest, we tend to be able to be more honest with them and accept their honesty. It’s helpful truth because of the love that is present. However, when we don’t feel safe or loved, that ability to be honest dwindles.
And though love as an emotion is fleeting, when we commit to showing love to one another as we’re told repeatedly in the Bible to do, we often feel more love. And though there are times when we have to push through not feeling love or being loved, the more we act out love, the more that feeling will show up.
So I want to challenge us to consider how much truth we have in our relationships. Are we honest with others about who we are and how we feel? If not, have we created a trusting relationship by showing love in tangible ways to those around us? I pray we can express love to the point that people feel the love. God bless.